My greatest fear might just getting up on a stage and singing a song to people. It wouldn’t matter if it was my own creation and I'd lived through the lyrics—I'm simply telling you that the words could never possibly be summoned to my mouth in order. My mind would go blank and, especially if it had been a while since my last improv class, I bet I wouldn’t even think of clever alternative words or anything verbal at all. I would just turn red in the face and my eyes would search the...
about 2 months ago • 7 min read
Hello to you from a sparkling summer! Time has moved differently at different times in my life. A few years ago, it was too fast, buttered-up plastic flamingos slipping down a hot slide, because of work. I was learning how to coach. I was building my business. I was hitting my $20K and $30K months. My life was falling apart in a whirl of pink, me doing my best to run from my postpartum depression. This time it's going too fast because of kittens. Pool day Fridays at 3 PM. A part-time work...
3 months ago • 4 min read
"I gave up on the possibility without even trying. And now, being through the wringer so thoroughly, I know if I don't reclaim my writing I won't make it through." - My journal lately Hi, friend, I hitchhiked my way into a sixteen wheeler of careless creativity and I’ve got no regrets! This is figurative, of course —I have a lot of breakfasts and lunches to make that would face serious disruption if I was on a truck right now. But that’s what it feels like to ruthlessly indulge in drawing...
4 months ago • 11 min read
"When is suffering useless? When it only turns us in upon ourselves, when it only makes us sorry for ourselves, when it changes love into hatred, when it reduces all things to fear." - Thomas Merton Hi, friend, I am so glad to report I am doing so much better! It's a combination of good reading, good supplements, and good time to myself. I am so relieved. I think the AI-depression is really, truly passing now. And I'm coming to terms with and healing from a lot of my ambition-related life...
5 months ago • 11 min read
“Oh! Be men, or be more than men. Be steady to your purposes and firm as a rock. This ice is not made of such stuff as your hearts may be; it is mutable and cannot withstand you if you say that it shall not." ― Mary Shelley, Frankenstein Hi, friend, It's been a month! I literally can't wait for you to watch this cat music video, so feel free to scroll down and watch that and then come back and read this. Wasn't it fantastic? This month has been a lot of family wrangling, dealing with a new...
6 months ago • 3 min read
"Ça fait tic tic un peu quand même." Miki Hi, friend, I know it's early April, but here's my thinking—I send the March one now, and then the April one later in the month. Double the tiny doodles for you, a satisfactory compeleted list for me! Winny win win! I have finally—FINALLY—made it through the full grief process for AI. I am so pleased to share I am finally feeling some energy and some creative flow. It's been a long time. There's still a lot wrong.... (A lot.) But I've been so inspired...
7 months ago • 3 min read
"Let go for dear life, just free fall." Emily Rowed Hi, friend, From newly un-iced palace of ice, I send a missive! I had to change this note from December to January and now to what it is. Life just hit me that hard. But here I am, having discovered an 8-oz cappuccino breve with lavender, living in this body, with these children, and these snowdays and delays, and I will be OK, and you will be OK, too, maybe. Here's a lot of what's going on for me artistically: Made me smile I had no idea...
8 months ago • 4 min read
Take a deep breath because you're going under, and there's no way to know when you'll come up again. Hi, friend, You know, even in the worst of my illness, I find it amazing how seen and at peace the right lyric or image can make me feel. I have a friend who doesn't listen to music, and I ask her endless questions about this. From a very young age, music gave a soundtrack to my feelings and experiences and just helped me connect better to what was around me. The idea of not having that feels...
11 months ago • 5 min read
Good morning Reader! It's 9AM on a Sunday as I write this and I've been up for * checks watch * three and a half hours. Sleep has always tormented me since becoming a mother. My oldest didn't sleep for more than 45 minutes to two hours for... years. And then somehow the second showed up (yes, I do know how). He slept better, but it's been some kind of sleep disturbance every few hours for years until lately. Always someone in the middle of the bed, asking for water or kicking his foot up and...
12 months ago • 9 min read